Kai ... I Could Have Sworn ..

Not for the first time today I could have sworn I heard you screaming, as only you could. But I guess when the brain takes over from the emotion I realise that it was just a distant sound, my mind playing tricks on me again. Maybe it was your granddaughter, or maybe your son, but my heart breaks and the tears flow as I realise that it wasn't you, it could never be you again. I'd pay anything now to hear your individual bark again, to look into those soft kind eyes and to throw my arms around your huge neck. I miss you so much words fail me, my beautiful big boy, My awesome dog!

Louis

Thanks for asking about Louis and giving me a nudge to update the information.... Louis' no better really, though the steroids do encourage him to eat. He had terrible diarrhea in his bed again last night, I don't think he has time to give us warning. He looks awful, he's so thin these days that his eyes appear sunken, he really looks like an old dog. But ... And it's a huge BUT, he's still totally oblivious to it all, full of beans, funny, playful and as cuddly as ever. As long as he doesn't feel the way he looks then we are all OK about it.. Michail the vet has laid it out honestly for me, the green poo is down to small bleeds in the intestine,they are neither here nor there. But if he has a rupture then there will be nothing they can do. I'm glad to have the information, it helps me to know and deal with it. But believe me I'm not dwelling on it, I'm enjoying every day with him, It's hard not too when he's throwing himself at me like an idiot!

Kiri Today

Strange Baby ....
Don't you think I'm looking older?
But something good has happened to me
Change is a stranger
You have yet to know

Kiri nearest the camera

  Jezi and Finlay behind her and Louis on his way back

Don't Tell Me What To Do ....



Ziva

Whilst I'm always willing to listen, open minded to advice and usually the first to ask a friends opinion; in my personal life I hate being told what to do. In my opinion it's not down to anyone other than my nearest and dearest to tell me what I "must do." By all means suggest and advice but I don't think anyone has the right to tell me how I should live my life, and the more people push the further I dig my heels in!! Steps down off soap box ....
The girls, yeah, that's what it's all about. Someone told me that I had no choice, I had to rehome one or even two of the girls, well I'm sorry that's my decision and the only other person who has any input on that subject is Steve. The other night after the latest fight I could have easily given both of the culprits away, but now things have settled and it's not that easy to think of giving them up. There's no doubt Jezi and Danni have issues and may well have to be permanently separated in the future. As I've always said, I will put them first, their future is far more important then my feelings, but I do have options. We do have kennels and could rotate and separate in the house as we do now with Kiri and have done for the last 13 years. It's not like it's something new to us, to us it's everyday life. It's whether this is the way we feel we should to go forward with Jezi and Danni... or not!


Danni

There's no doubt that Danni has bonded strongly with Steve and that Ziva is my baby, but my bond with Jezi has strengthen greatly over the last month or two. She was without doubt the trouble maker here, the outsider; but these days her and Ziva get on well it's just Danni that she has a problem with. Jezi is totally respectful of us and the adults and without doubt if she was the only pup their would never have been any issue. These days she's looking more like her mum and getting closer to us, just like Asha did as she grew up. (she was aloof as a youngster) To be fair the fights haven't all been her fault either, Danni is just as much to blame and Ziva is not faultless either, though she does tend to be oblivious to most of the tension.


Jezi

So what are we going to do? Hell I don't know. In a perfect world we'd tell them all to get on and carry on in bliss, but we all know in the real world it never works that way. Please don't think I'm being callous, I'm trying to be sensible and planning for the future; Kiri is 13 and that's a big age for a GSD. If we can cope for now then there will be the facility to keep them apart sooner or later.
The thought of having to give one up is heartbreaking, but no one here can carry on living like this indefinitely either. Because of the situation there's tension amongst the adults as well. Things don't have to change now, but we must see that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
The decision still isn't made but my hope is that they can all stay, that somehow it becomes workable for all to have the life they deserve. One thing is for sure if one does have to be rehomed then it can only be to a better home, someone who can give them more than we can!

H litter boys at 8 months

 Diesel

Harley

In His Own words ....

Ok my lovelies, WHITE LIGHT is done and dusted! Am I allowed to say it may be the best dance record I've ever made

Finished it today..... :)

Sisters

And you'd think butter wouldn't melt!!

Danni and Jezi - together!
*****

Where is my photo?

Little Miss Ziva, scared of missing out!

It Doesn't Get Better ...

Last night we finally came to the conclusion that Danni and Jezi can no longer live together. 4 fights in 2 weeks, with gashes and cuts on both. One of them will have to go before someone really gets hurt. We are both heartbroken but for the sake of everyone we feel we have no choice. I always predicted that Ziva and Jezi would be trouble together as Danni was quite submissive as a youngster. But times have changed and though I still think Danni fears Jezi she won't be bullied these days! So the search for a home restarts and at present we would be willing to let either go if the home was right for them.

Despite new medication and a prescription diet Louis has had diarrhea all week. Though he is still a happy bunny it must be distressing for him to have an "accident" in the house, and worse still in his bed. He is down to 27kg again and I'm no very worried about his future. I phoned the vet this morning and she is concerned that the Sulphasalazine didn't help him. I'm going to collect him some Metronidazole and some steroids shortly. And so the period of "hope" begins again .....

George Time

George - Lifting my spirits

So much has gone on in my George world and I haven't reported it. Photo's and news of George out and about, photo's of him on holiday with Fadi. (and those photo's that emerged of Fadi!!! OMG - definitely not to be printed here) There have even been photo's of him out with Kenny. Maybe in future I'll regret not documenting the news, but really I've not been in a good place and it's taken a lot of effort to just function.
After loosing Kai I just didn't seem to be able to get myself together. Emotionally I fell apart, but then I started to suffer some physical symptoms too. Reluctantly I went to the Doctor and she said I was suffering from Stress, but decided to do blood tests to rule out any physical issues. Good thing she did, she discovered I have an overactive thyroid, this gives many of the same symptoms as stress. So pills, regular blood tests and a hospital referral to sort out the dose and I should be back on track in a few weeks! :)
I knew there was a logical explanation for all my strange behaviour !!! (LOL)

Kai - still breaking my heart.

Anyway, back to George .... During the time that Kai was ill, George announced the new dates for the "Symphonica tour" ...I'd been waiting with such anticipation for this announcement, but at the time I don't think I was even able to cracked a smile. Now I am starting to think about it, finally now I feel I have something to focus on, to look forward too. I'll be seeing George at the MEN on the 21st of September and again on the 9th of October with the Echo concert being on the 10th of October.
Linda, can I book my room please?

Visitor

 -Blanik Extrovert -Arko 

It was lovely to see Arko today, he's looking great.