Ziva

 I wrote a short blog post about Ziva at the time of her 11 birthday, I couldn't write it any better now so if you chose to refresh your memory then click on this link ziva-one-who-stays-at-home.html 

This photo was taken on Thursday, the day that we lost her. She looks so well, but here she was recovering from the first of the fits that would terrorise her and us on the day. She'd had a single and less severe fit only 10 days earlier and I thought this was going to be the same. Within and hour the second fit came, it left her terrified and with dreadful mobility, but still I hoped for a recovery.

The third fit was something else, she seemed to be coming round and went straight into another, was that 4 fits or the third one prolonged? I don't know. When she came round poor Ziva was in such a state, she seemed to have lost her sight and for the life of me I couldn't keep her still, she banged into everything and had little control of her legs. Steve felt it was time, I was still hanging onto a thread of hope, but when Beth the vet said she felt things would deteriorate quickly now I too had to let go. I couldn't see her go through any more of that pain. 

I stood outside the vet with the lead in my hand as they waited for me to take her in, for some minutes I couldn't find the strength to take that step forward, but with Steve by my side I had to do it for Ziva. Ziva went from this world quickly, there was no fight left in her, she was simply exhausted. 

Steve was devastated that he wasn't well enough to bring her home to bury with her family. Ziva has gone to Holyhead for cremation and will be back home soon. If he chooses, he can then bury the casket next to her family in our memorial garden. I'll leave that decision up to him.

Life can be tough, we've had it all thrown at us these last 12 months, here's hoping for a bright future, but thank you Ziva for everyday that you spent with us, thank you, it was a privilege and a pleasure.