Friday 24 February 2023

One Week On

Thanks to everyone who messages yesterday, it was appreciated. So much can change so quickly, can't it. Those who know me well know that for days my coping mechanism for loss is not to talk to anyone outside my immediate bubble. I'm quite happy with messenger etc but picking up the phone is just too much, though Katrina left me no choice and has phoned almost every day since the weekend. Did it help? Well once we got the first call out of the way, it certainly didn't make things worse. 
The question that's asked almost every time we lose a family member is, are the others missing them? Well I'd say no, they are quite a big family so it doesn't seem to affect them in the same way as I guess it would if one dog was left behind. I've mentioned Sammi and the van game I'm sure, at the end of a walk Sammi would run back and hide behind the van, then as her mum came into sight she'd charge her, they'd exchange words then Ziva and Sammi would run off together. Sadly now she has no one to play the game with, but for a couple of days she still ran back to hide behind the van. I found it quite heartbreaking I must admit, if only I could have explained it to her. 
If anyone is missing Ziva then it will be Sammi, they were close. There is no bond between Kaiah and Sammi, Sammi wishes we'd sold her daughter as a puppy, and she wouldn't mind if we rehomed her for free now! LOL. I guess Sammi still has a bond with Loki, but Ross decided a couple of years ago that he was her best friend, not sure how keen she is on the matter but she has no choice. Kaiah dumped Ross for a maturing Orin, so Ross moved on to Sammi. I've had two youngsters together for the last three generations, Sammi and Loki, Kaiah and Ross then Orin and Siska have all been just months apart. I've absolutely loved it, it's been very rewarding and so much fun, but they haven't stayed in pairs, they have all just blended into a family. It's been far better doing it that way than keeping siblings, and I don't intend doing that again. 
Siska is now OTT, really silly, as the bitches often are when their seasons are close. Ross and Orin both take turns to play with her, but when it becomes a threesome I usually stop it. The boys are getting on really well and I don't want anything to change that. I really want Siska to come in season now, today, but I also want her to hang on till after Crufts. The day after would be good Sisks! Focusing on something positive for the future is the distraction I need ... I'm looking forward to one day, hopefully, meeting Miss Otis and her siblings