Night Thoughts

Another sleepless night whilst the old brain refused to sleep. It's just so frustrating and without doubt only made worse with the irritability of not being able to stop thinking and not being able to sleep. So I get up, have a cuppa, scrawl through Facebook for an hour and try again, still no success. It doesn't help to be told that I should stop doing this to myself, stop thinking and go to sleep. It's not voluntary, if only it was that easy!
I'm waiting for something from someone, they say they will do it asap, but I'm still waiting. Now at this time of day I understand they have lives of their own,things to do, but in the middle of the night .. I don't understand and I'm irritable with them too!
At least one thing is clear this morning, Mr handsome (pictured) will not be joining us at Blanik. His breeder feels he hasn't quite got the X.factor needed to be a show dog. I'm sad, but obviously grateful for her honesty. So lets see if plan B works out then, I currently don't have a plan C.
Obviously the main cause for my current insomnia is Sammi,

and the is she isn't she question? Now I can understand that hormones would make her nipples go pink, would give her boobs, would put her off her breakfast, and even make her fanny stay puffy (lovely turn of phrase don't you think!!)... but now she's got a belly, a small one but still a belly. A belly that is more obvious in the evening than the morning. .. now that can't be hormones .. can it? Anyway tomorrow should be day 44, and according to "The Book" in small litters abdominal enlargements are not noticeable till after day 45. I know what I hope is going on, and I've had the same thought since about Wednesday .... hopefully the scan tomorrow will confirm this and that I'm not left devastated again. (though obviously this time I am at least partly prepared for more disappointment)